Weirdest. Date. Ever.

So I went on a date last night, but before I get to the actual date I need to relate how I met this boy...

...One day at work a boy came in. This boy was reasonably attractive, and we started to casually chat about the book I was reading when he came in. School came up, the fact that I served a mission also came up. He then said, "A mission? What's a mission?" I asked as politely as I could if he was serious, then proceeded to give an overview of what an LDS mission is. The conversation went on for a while and he mentioned that he recently read the Bible, so we talked more about religion. I guessed that he was either a less-active member or a nonmember. He seemed nice enough so I didn't think too much of it. Well, he asked if he could give my number to his friend. I wasn't worried about him wanting the number for himself, I didn't think that would be a big deal so I gave it to him.

Over the course of a few days he sent me a few text messages, letting me know that he would like to take me on a date and that he actually was LDS, he was simply lying to me when we first met. I figured I might as well go on a date with him, I didn't have a good reason to turn him down. So I went. Boy was I in for a treat.

We got beverages first, at Starbucks. Weird choice for two LDS people, but I just got hot chocolate, he got a tea-free smoothie. I guess he had that smoothie before and just really wanted another one that day. That's not the interesting part though. Because he was lying during our entire conversation when we met, I didn't know anything about this guy. One of my questions was this, "So, tell me about your family." Easy right? Well, his answer was, "I actually ran away from home when I was younger so I don't know where my family is and I don't care. What about you?" My answer was less shocking by far. When I had answered his question he said, "Well, that was very concise. Most people go on and on about their families, which is why I came up with that answer. It keeps it simple, even if most people don't appreciate or even really like that answer." The tricky thing is, the guy keeps a straight face while telling you these absurd stories so I really had no idea if he was serious or not! Anyway, conversation continued like that for about a half hour. I still have NO idea if he is actually a student, what his actual major is, how old he is, or where he is from. He told me answers but I'm not sure if he was being honest. I did know his name because I looked at his credit card when I sold him candy when we met. This helped because yes I did facebook stalk him before our date.

Moving on, our next destination was the dollar movie theater to watch Source Code. The movie was fine, interesting idea but too many holes. The interesting part of the movie was my date. He would lean over periodically and whisper things in my ear, getting so close that his lips would actually touch my ear! Gross! I would lean away and give short answers usually. Well, at one point he grabbed my arm, trying to pull my folded arm out of that position so he could hold my hand! I patted the hand he was grabbing my arm with then folded my arms back up. He then leaned over and whispered, "I figured that we probably won't ever see each other again and the movie is getting boring so I thought I'd hold your hand to make things less boring." Really? I told him I don't hold hands on the first date and he said he usually doesn't either. Weird. It never occurred to me to leave the date. I didn't feel unsafe or physically threatened I just felt very confused and almost in shock at how he was behaving. It's like one of those movies that you don't actually like but you keep watching it because you really want to know what is happening.

WELL, after the movie we left (and ran into his sister on the way out. Uncanny family resemblance and her introducing herself to me as his sister clued me in on that one, he does know where his family is after all.) and I thought he was going to take me back to my car. We met at the mall because I had just gotten off work and I didn't want him knowing where I lived just in case. Well, he didn't go to the mall. He went to In-&-Out. He hadn't eaten dinner and wanted food. Well he got his food and proceeded to psych-analyze me. Oh, he did offer to share his fries. One of his questions was, "Have you ever actually had physical contact with a boy outside your family?" Who asks that, on a first date especially!? He asked me lots of rude questions about why I am the way I am, telling me that I would be more appealing for guys to date if I basically was more dramatic. I guess I was too boring for him.

So after a while I pointed out that we should go, which we did. He took me back to my car, in a well-lit parking lot that actually had several people in it. He walked me to my car, grabbed my face and put his cheek on mine! It was like he wanted to see what I'd do if he tried to kiss me! I just kind of backed up and started to get in my car at that point. This guy was super weird!!! I got in my car while saying goodbye and drove off relatively quickly. The end.

As I said before, I think I was too shocked to ask him to take me home before I did. It gave me a good story to tell but I am sadly not surprised that boy is single. Needless to say, I've never experienced anything quite like that before and hopefully will not have to go on a date like that ever again. Again, it's a good story though.